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Emotionless obsession?

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  • So I broke up with my boyfriend on impulse and instantly regretted it for an unknown reason. But I felt the same withdrawal I felt after I quit drinking. I don't fully believe I ever loved him because I only really feel feelings for myself. After he refused to take me back I stalked him a little bit. He didn't seem to care but this was two months ago and I still think about him obsessively. Can you feel obsession without emotions?

  • Absolutely! Humans want what they can't have. I think your obsession is simply that, you just want him because you can't have him. Your regret after breaking up with him could be a subconscious thought that you're going to be alone for the rest of your life. I think this happens with a lot of things, like cars for example. When you lose your car in an accident or whatnot you feel some type of hopelessness, that you'll never be able to get something as good as what you lost. But obviously this isn't true and despite knowing it you still think about what you lost and desire it, or in your case obsess.

    I think you'll immediately lose your obsession once you start dating someone else.

    This is just my opinion though, I'm not an expert on psychology.

    BTW, welcome to the forums! 🙂

  • Here is the problem with that: I have started dating someone else. I feel absolutely nothing for them. They probably feel a ton of emotions toward me but I feel nothing. I don't even think it's my obsession for my ex getting in the way either. I just feel as though I can't love because I can go on a dating site and search for another while I'm dating him but feel no remorse. I feel no shame in it either. Of course if he found out [size=xx-large]there would be a problem for me. Not sure why because I don't have feelings for him in the slightest but I'll go to a psychologist for definite answers.[/size]

  • That's definitely a good idea, it seems like you don't really know why it's happening. A good psychologist should be able to get to the bottom of it. I hope it's free where you live as there are many bad psychologists that have no idea what they're talking about. I hope you don't have to deal with one. But, you could maybe check to see if they're any good by googling their names and reading the reviews, if there are any.